The macho culture in Bolivia leads to structural violence against women

In countless Bolivian homes, a deafening silence prevails. A silence of millions of women, soaked in fear, maintained by centuries of male dominance. But Carmen (46) refuses to stay silent any longer. She has found the courage to share her story, to help women in Bolivia. Every three days, a woman is murdered in this South American country. Despite how painful her memories are, Carmen proves there is hope for the future.

‘It breaks my heart when I think back on what I’ve survived,’ Carmen begins her story. As a young girl, she grew up in a small village, where she already saw that women had no say in anything. But nothing could have prepared her for what was to come.

Violence is justified and accepted

‘When I got pregnant at 22, I moved in with my partner and his family. Far away from my own family. That’s when the trouble began.’ Carmen shakes her head as she recalls the first time her husband hit her while drunk. ‘His family thought it was perfectly normal. They were used to it; my husband had seen his father hit his mother when he was a child.’ Carmen didn’t dare stand up to her in-laws and kept her head down. But her husband always found an excuse to be violent. ‘If a passerby looked at me on the street, my husband was convinced I knew him and was flirting. I had no idea who the man was!’ She throws her hands up in frustration. ‘That was enough reason for my husband to break my nose, threaten me with a knife, or scream that he’d kill me. And all of that in front of our son.’

“My husband had seen his father hit his mother as a child” – Carmen

The blow that became her rescue

After eight horrific years, the violence reached an extreme peak when Carmen’s husband beat her unconscious in a fit of rage. ‘I woke up in the hospital, covered in my own blood. I had no idea how I’d gotten there.’ Carmen, who had kept silent all those years out of fear, called her mother in tears. ‘She begged me to come live with her in the city of El Alto.’ She accepted the invitation, but her husband moved with the family as well. ‘He regularly threatened that he wouldn’t pay child support if I left him. I was also scared it would harm my son to grow up without his father.’

Yet, moving to El Alto marked a turning point in Carmen’s life. Through flyers distributed in her neighborhood, she came into contact with a local partner of Mensen met een Missie. This foundation takes in victims of violence, supports them through legal procedures, and provides education and awareness-raising programs. ‘It was only here that I realized the violence in my marriage wasn’t normal,’ Carmen says.

Alarming number of femicides

The extent of the problem of violence against women in Bolivia becomes clear when we speak to Patricia Bozo de Durán, director of the foundation. ‘In the first six months of 2023, 58 women were murdered just because they were women. That’s 20 percent more than during the same period last year.’ The deep concerns are written all over Patricia’s face. She tells us that over 50,000 cases of violence against women are reported annually. ‘And these are nowhere near the real numbers!’ She explains that most women don’t report it, out of fear of retaliation from their partner, but also because they know the procedures are complicated and often pointless.

The problem is the macho culture

According to Patricia, the root of the problem lies in Bolivia’s macho culture. In this culture, men are considered superior, and aggression is equated with masculinity. ‘This culture perpetuates the idea that men have more rights than women, and it normalizes violence,’ she says. ‘Girls are raised with the belief that they are inferior and incapable, and that it’s their own fault if a man hits them. We are taught this from birth, and it has been going on for centuries. Not just by men, but sometimes even by our own mothers. It’s what everyone is used to.’

Prevention, support, and advocacy

Together with Patricia and many other partners in Bolivia, we work to break these patterns. ‘It’s crucial that Bolivians start to see that it’s not normal to hit your wife. And that it’s not normal for women to have no voice!’ Patricia speaks with fire in her eyes about the equality workshops she organizes. She does this at schools, but also with the police, the military, transport unions, and neighborhood councils. ‘We also train survivors of violence to become leaders, who inspire and support other women with their own stories. We hope to break the barriers of silence surrounding abuse in this way.’

“Only when men see that violence is not normal will women in Bolivia be safe” – Patricia Bozo de Durán

We also work a lot with boys and men to change the macho idea of masculinity. Patricia: ‘We want them to think differently about what it means to be a man and to realize that vulnerability and talking about your emotions are not weaknesses.’ Additionally, our Bolivian partners work together to improve policy. Through actions, campaigns, and advocacy, they push for reforms and better law enforcement.

Crucial support for Carmen

Besides creating a better future, we are, of course, also here for the victims themselves. Or, as Patricia prefers to call them: survivors. Women like Carmen receive all the support they need from the foundation: medical help, legal assistance, mediation, and trauma counseling. Carmen: ‘Through Patricia, I got help from a lawyer. He summoned my partner to the foundation, where they mediated between us. To my surprise, my husband agreed to psychotherapy.’ It was the beginning of a transformation, for Carmen, her husband, and their relationship.

‘We received both individual and joint psychological help. It was a long process, but it changed a lot.’ Visibly relieved, she tells us that she now has a stable life. Her husband has become a changed man. ‘I never thought it was possible, but he has come to understand that his past behavior was wrong.’ As their relationship stabilized, the couple had three more children. Carmen: ‘He is now determined to protect our daughters from violence.’

Stories like Carmen’s give hope for the future. Just like the number of people Patricia reaches with her workshops. ‘Besides helping 840 female survivors this year, 660 men also came to our center. And of the 7,000 participants in our workshops, 2,000 were men! We are reaching more and more men, and that’s exactly what’s important. Only when they see that violence is not normal will women in Bolivia be safe.’

A long road ahead

The road ahead is long and challenging, but Carmen’s story shows the transformative power of support and awareness. Patricia: ‘We must continue to stand up for equality and respect for women’s rights.’ Side by side with the survivors, our local partners do everything they can to break the cycle of violence in Bolivia. So that future generations grow up in a country where women do matter.